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 You think you're so smart don't ya.

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Porter MaCleod
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Main Event
Porter MaCleod

Number of posts : 121
Registration date : 2006-11-30

PostSubject: You think you're so smart don't ya.   June 18th 2008, 5:42 am

The camera cues in on Porter MacLeod lacing up his boots in a locker room.

Porter: Well, we see he finally spoke. Too bad he just made himself look even more like an idiot.

First off, I know that Derbyshire is in England, not Scotland. Out of all these years, you think you're the first one to point that out? You're not. You see, when you have a handsome mug like mine, you got to watch who you give your personal information out to. That way there's no line of hundreds of lasses standing in line waiting to see you walk out your door in the morning.
And judging by how big of an ass I can be, that way there's not big burly lads waiting to kick me arse when I get home.

But anyways...back to you being an idiot. Any lad that's going to put stock in DXLatin being on their side, is an idiot. I remember when this lad started here, he didn't know how to throw a punch without hitting himself. All he did was bitch about this, bitch about that and it made me sick. Hell, he outbitched Cunt Pie, I mean Cutie Pie...and that's a lot to outbitch...

And what I REALLY can't stand about you lad, is how you HAVE to tell your lass your every single move.

"Hunnie, I'm going to look to my left shoulder.
Hunnie, I'm going to yawn..
Hunnie, I'm going to call you hunnie all the damn time and make people want to hurt me because I'm an idiot."

Shut the fuck up, lad!
If you're just trying to fill in space for a promo so that it doesn't seem too short. Sing or dance or do something besides what it is that you do...

Just one question lad...what the fuck does this mean?

Tonight us will see what us paid money for.

You said that several hours ago...And I'm still dumbfounded at your idiocy. Captain Caveman over here thinks he's something doesn't he? Well guess what...I don't have to keep on telling everyone, you just proved me right...that you're an even bigger idiot than what I was giving you credit for.

You also said that I was going to feel what a real Scotsman was like...I'm not so sure I want to get into the ring with you. Instead of DXLatin for a partner, sounds like you need Vinnie Vicious for a partner. I don't want to feel you...you sick fuck.

When I rub the stubble on my cheeks, I can feel a real Scotsman. And if you lass wasn't so fucking ugly, I'd show her how a real Scotsman shags...But I don't think I could even think about fucking her, even if I was shitfaced or really desperate.

I highly doubt that you even have the itelligence to know how to get in between those ropes on your own....that's why you slide in...
I might just be an asshole, and get the tech crew to raise it up a bit from what you're used to, so I can see you faceplant right into the side of the ring. That would make my day...

Besides kicking your ass, I think degrading your intelligence is what is going to make my week so grand.
Lad, you can think it all you want that you're going to win this match...but you're going to be a sorry lad once I'm done with ya. I'm going to kick your ass so hard that you'll have to tie my shoe before you can brush your teeth.
I don't need to say much more, cause I doubt you'll have anything worth saying after this...you'll probably cry yourself to sleep tonight...not from what I've said has hurt you...but probably has confused you.
So don't think too hard lad, you'll hurt yourself...I don't want too much more of an easier win than I've already got.
So go on, do your worst...its just going to make me laugh that much harder.

Porter finishes lacing his boots as he shakes his head at how much fun he's having with this.

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